hey girls
you know when you're about to go home, and guys all pack up their stuff to walk you home? then i guess two very natural reactions come to mind: either that you feel like it's totally out of their way to walk you home and in some ways it's pointless and a waste of time, or you feel defensive that the macho guys think that they have to walk you home because you can't take care of yourself.
well, i don't even think it's that dangerous for girls to walk home at night by themselves.
have you ever thought that maybe, sometimes we just want to have a nice walk with you?
10 comments:
the first time that someone did that was at ccf in my first year. i don't think that it was anymore safer for me to be walking home with a ccf stranger, but what he did had a lasting impact on me as i hadn't seen it happen elsewhere.
thank you for this post.
yea. i feel really bad when it seems like i make someone leave just because they have to walk me home...because i am perfectly able to walk home by myself. however, you're right. sometimes it is about the conversations that happen or just the fact that a deeper friendship can be built from these simple acts of kindness.
=)
i've thought about that before, but then how do you differentiate between times when they actually want to walk u home and times when they're just offering because of "obligation" (ie it's your "duty")? Maybe next time someone offers, I'll say "well, you'll have to fill out a questionnaire first, as to what are your intentions in walking me home".
Intentions are definitely important. If a guy is walking a girl home with the intention of trying to impress her, then I will question that.
If the reason is because of "obligation", then that will depend on realistically how likely something danger can happen. This can refer to time of the day, outside conditions, etc. But there is a Chinese saying: "Don't be scared of 10,000, but be scared of 1/10000" [1]. Essentially, we don't worry for all the times where nothing happens, but, God forbid, the one occasion where something does [2].
In the end, I think it's something honorable to do.
References:
[1] My dad's words of wisdom
[2] Herman's interpretation
My interpretation of the chinese saying is that an individual is more likely to do something he shouldn't do when he is alone. But when there are 10,000 people, no one will do anything they shouldn't do because everyone is keeping each other accountable for their actions.
Thus, this means that instead of 1 guy walking 1 girl home, the ratio should be 10,000 guys walking 1 girl home.
hahah oh Jorge's response is so funny..
what got you to write this post? just wondering.
haha. joses takes the win
i vote joses too :) but even if a guy did have ulterior motives for walking a girl home, at least it could be more attractive than other approaches.
though, i suppose if you were the guy that stood by the tree half a block away from my house and waited for me to approach before walking, then i would consider it creepy and borderline stalking...
i really appreciate guys offering to walk girls home because it shows their kindness or concern for the safety of the girl...yet at the same time, when I have been asked, I often refuse (not because I'm defensive that this guy is trying to be macho...)but rather that i'll simply "ma-fan" the person to have to walk all that way...and then possibly have to maybe walk himself home alone...
haha thank you for that insight, victor. It's interesting to see a guy's point of view on this matter. It has to some degree made me less hesitant to accept this offer of chivalry. =)
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