currently on final exams. i have 6, and they start this coming week.
august 2, 3, 5, 8, 10, 12.
i think those will keep me quite occupied. these exams will be highly difficult, as there is a possibility that i could fail any of them.
also working on readjusting lifestyle again.
maybe will post something more meaningful after exams.
victor
Friday, July 29, 2005
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
wha'happened?!
for those that wondered if victor is still alive.. he actually is!
toronto must be missing him. (or forgetting him). if you are missing him, he appreciates you very much. well.. he appreciates you very much, but you get bonus points for missing him.
if you're forgetting him, that is normal, because victor can be quite a forgettable person.
victor sent me to inform everyone that he has been busy with school work. he has about 2 weeks of school that he has to catch up on after midterms. he says that he failed 2 of his 6 midterms, but he is still adamant on fixing those up and doing better during finals.
victor tells me to say that it would be much appreciated if you left him a message or an email or a phone call even. if he had the time, he would do the same to you.
if you would like to contact him, please tell me such that i could deliver the message to him. thank you everybody.
toronto must be missing him. (or forgetting him). if you are missing him, he appreciates you very much. well.. he appreciates you very much, but you get bonus points for missing him.
if you're forgetting him, that is normal, because victor can be quite a forgettable person.
victor sent me to inform everyone that he has been busy with school work. he has about 2 weeks of school that he has to catch up on after midterms. he says that he failed 2 of his 6 midterms, but he is still adamant on fixing those up and doing better during finals.
victor tells me to say that it would be much appreciated if you left him a message or an email or a phone call even. if he had the time, he would do the same to you.
if you would like to contact him, please tell me such that i could deliver the message to him. thank you everybody.
Monday, June 20, 2005
the posting where i don't know what to write
this is the posting where i don't know what to write.
i haven't posted anything for over 3 weeks now i think?
a lot of things could happen in 3 weeks.
midterms was a very aggghgaahhchoochoozzzzzssshhhbbaaccchh-like experience. they start off fairly good with calculus, but they started going downhill from there.
it was an academically painful experience.
but it wasn't the most painful part of the time.
critical time for changing myself. what is most important?
please be clear, and tell me what to do.
what should i doo?
i haven't posted anything for over 3 weeks now i think?
a lot of things could happen in 3 weeks.
midterms was a very aggghgaahhchoochoozzzzzssshhhbbaaccchh-like experience. they start off fairly good with calculus, but they started going downhill from there.
it was an academically painful experience.
but it wasn't the most painful part of the time.
critical time for changing myself. what is most important?
please be clear, and tell me what to do.
what should i doo?
Sunday, May 29, 2005
being your own enemy
being your own enemy.
this was the topic of the sermon this morning at church. and for once, the message actually went to my mind.
it was a clear explanation as to why life was going the way it was. sometimes i wonder if there was some way to.. look at yourself from the outside, as if you were another person, and to do that right. if that was possible, life would be in a totally different perspective.
you would begin to see your own habits. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. maybe your own way of walking to the store, eating your food, or something more than that. but it becomes very clear to you.
you would begin to see how you truly interact with people. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. your mannerisms. your tone of voice. how you say something actually comes out as something totally different. maybe you think about this, and you realize how big of a dork you were. or how much of an encourager you could be. but all this, you will begin to see.
of course, you would begin to see how you make decisions in your life. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. what you choose to do first, and what you choose to do next, and why. you would see what your true motives really are, not just what you thought they were. you learn what really is important to you, and not just what you thought was important. all this, you would see when you knew how to look.
there are certainly more things that we could see if we could look at ourselves from the outside. certainly, i believe that God sees us this way very clearly. He not only knows what we see, but He knows what is real. it is unfortunate that we are not capable of seeing life in this light, because it distorts reality. this is how you become your own enemy.
the enemy is discreet. he moves into where you are weak, and he plants his little tent. he has little interruption there, as he begins to plan his next move. you notice him, but he has meant you no harm. so you leave him, and walk away, while he watches you leave, and begins to set up for his ultimate attack. his territory grows. still you do not heed to the warnings of your mind, but soon he will take over. and he does take over. one day you return to see him, but the entire area had been taken over. he has launched his attack, and amalgamated himself to you. you become him.
this is what i notice today. i noticed that i have forgotten what is most important, and i have been captured in my own pride and strength. i was deluded, and i believe that i still am. but i pray for no more of this. i pray for change. i pray for a new character. i pray for a heart of love and humility. for a victor that works with all he can, alongside of his saviour. for a victor that relies on the strength of Christ, the convicting energy of the Spirit, and the wisdom of the Word. and for a victor that fights like a soldier, never to give up, but to always stand again when he his down. and to stand up all the more gloriously, in the hand of his Father.
this is what i pray. what about you today? have you become your own enemy? are you blinding yourself from things that you should be seeing? maybe you are. if you think so, maybe you could try a simple exercise. think of some different people that you interact with. how are your interactions with "you"? what does "you" act like? is there any possibility that "you" has offended you? why do you think that "you" would say and act a particular way, and based on what? try this with different people, with different incidents. then also try it with the Word of God. what does the Word of God say about how you live?
that is it. do not become your own enemy. it is hard to get out.
victor
this was the topic of the sermon this morning at church. and for once, the message actually went to my mind.
it was a clear explanation as to why life was going the way it was. sometimes i wonder if there was some way to.. look at yourself from the outside, as if you were another person, and to do that right. if that was possible, life would be in a totally different perspective.
you would begin to see your own habits. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. maybe your own way of walking to the store, eating your food, or something more than that. but it becomes very clear to you.
you would begin to see how you truly interact with people. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. your mannerisms. your tone of voice. how you say something actually comes out as something totally different. maybe you think about this, and you realize how big of a dork you were. or how much of an encourager you could be. but all this, you will begin to see.
of course, you would begin to see how you make decisions in your life. what was once invisible becomes completely clear. what you choose to do first, and what you choose to do next, and why. you would see what your true motives really are, not just what you thought they were. you learn what really is important to you, and not just what you thought was important. all this, you would see when you knew how to look.
there are certainly more things that we could see if we could look at ourselves from the outside. certainly, i believe that God sees us this way very clearly. He not only knows what we see, but He knows what is real. it is unfortunate that we are not capable of seeing life in this light, because it distorts reality. this is how you become your own enemy.
the enemy is discreet. he moves into where you are weak, and he plants his little tent. he has little interruption there, as he begins to plan his next move. you notice him, but he has meant you no harm. so you leave him, and walk away, while he watches you leave, and begins to set up for his ultimate attack. his territory grows. still you do not heed to the warnings of your mind, but soon he will take over. and he does take over. one day you return to see him, but the entire area had been taken over. he has launched his attack, and amalgamated himself to you. you become him.
this is what i notice today. i noticed that i have forgotten what is most important, and i have been captured in my own pride and strength. i was deluded, and i believe that i still am. but i pray for no more of this. i pray for change. i pray for a new character. i pray for a heart of love and humility. for a victor that works with all he can, alongside of his saviour. for a victor that relies on the strength of Christ, the convicting energy of the Spirit, and the wisdom of the Word. and for a victor that fights like a soldier, never to give up, but to always stand again when he his down. and to stand up all the more gloriously, in the hand of his Father.
this is what i pray. what about you today? have you become your own enemy? are you blinding yourself from things that you should be seeing? maybe you are. if you think so, maybe you could try a simple exercise. think of some different people that you interact with. how are your interactions with "you"? what does "you" act like? is there any possibility that "you" has offended you? why do you think that "you" would say and act a particular way, and based on what? try this with different people, with different incidents. then also try it with the Word of God. what does the Word of God say about how you live?
that is it. do not become your own enemy. it is hard to get out.
victor
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